The Fly
Little fly,
Thy summer’s play
My thoughtless hand
Has brushed away.
Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?
For I dance
And drink and sing,
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.
If thought is life
And strength and breath,
And the want
Of thought is death,
Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die.
William Blake (1757-1827)
I’m reminded of my childhood when everything shifted and I
became more conscious of a world bigger than my physical sphere.
Without defining my spiritual practice, I suppose I lean towards
animism, this took a leap as a girl of 7 or 8 years old when I gave
birth to my senses. Blake’s, The Fly reminds me to that change, when a
small winged creature was no different than I. The ephemeral quality of
life, for in an instant to swat a fly whose demise is sudden and swift
has consequence. That I may become aware of how infinitesimally small I
am as I relate to the universe. Just a speck am I, when I became aware
of all living things and my connectedness. It began with catching
butterflies and setting them free in the garden, and took a more tragic
turn one hot summer day in Tehran, the day a bird I had somehow trapped
in a shed died, from lack of air and light to see.
The next quotation is pulled from Mary
Wollstonecraft, a vindication of the Rights of Woman. (162) Mary was
drawing a comparison Between Newton being a superior being trapped in
the human body. To somehow equate this with a women who are perhaps
trapped in a designated role by virtue of their femaleness.
“I have been led to imagine that the few
extraordinary women who have rushed in eccentrical directions out of
the orbit prescribed to their sex, were male spirited, confined by
mistake in a female frame. But if it be not philosophical to think of
sex when the soul is mentioned, the inferiority must depend on the
organs; or the heavenly fire, which is to ferment the clay, is not
given in equal portions…”
Mary Wollstonecraft
It’s an interesting parallel, and considering Mary wrote this
first as “Anonymous” followed by the second edition in 1791 in her name
is remarkable. Although much has changed since this time it still is
quite evident that in my own experience as a woman the body in which I
am born and the choices I have made are connected to my femaleness and
how others view me. I ‘m reminded to one day in Manhattan having just
arrived when a man with carefully measured advice told me New York was
too tough for a girl like me and I should run back to California where
I belong. I remember turning to him and exclaiming, “No, I’m fiercely
independent” My visceral response had much to do with his perception of
me as a woman. It’s interesting to note that I stayed in New York for
some time, but my choices in work had very much to do with being a
young woman, I soon became, "Maria the Go-Go girl" (Ok that’s another
story….)
Also from a Vindication of the rights of Woman, is the following
passage from Chapter 3 (163)
“The first care of those mothers or fathers who really attend to
the education of females should be, if not to strengthen the body, at
least not to destroy the constitution by mistaken notions of beauty and
female excellence; nor should girls ever be allowed to imbibe the
pernicious notion that a defect can, by any chemical process of
reasoning, become an excellence….”
As a returning college student in the year 2008, I’m well aware of the
progress since Mary’s time. And yet there is still the pervasive view
of a sensible path, and the proper course one must take in life.
Fortunately I don’t prescribe to this view, nor do I feel that should
impede on my progress. On a side note, while I’m thrilled that a woman
is running for President I have the right to chose as a constituent,
and my voice counts in determining those bigger choices.
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